September 18th, 2012
Free Write
In love? Am I in love? How was I supposed to know!? What is that even supposed to mean? I think I was but am I now?
"Awh."
"Haha, you're not gonna say it back?"
"No, it's all good."
"Oh no I love you... too."
It wasn't bad timing. It was me. All of these months, thirteen to be exact, and I knew and felt it all over sometimes. Others, I didn't. When people change,
October 29th, 2012 ( I didn't know it at the time, but this would be 3 days until my last boyfriend would dump me)
Do you believe in love at first sight?
No, I don't.. or maybe love at first sight is the only way to fall truely in love. I don't even think love is real. I believe it's a myth. Maybe only girls fall in love because I am convinced that no male knows how to love. None of them. Boys are liars. The sad truth. Love doesn't exsist; we just wish that it did. Everyone wants it to but no. Never will there be a time where love is real. Maybe just maybe when world peace is real, love will be just as real, also. I hate sitting here writing about love because it hurts to know that it's all a lie. It's made up because if it were, real everyone including me would know how to feel it. But not everyone's lucky enough to know how. What misfortune.
November 15th, 2012
Free write
How could I really be mad at her? I love her. But she doesn't love me. I'm looking her in the eye like are you serious!? I leave for one day and she cheats on me with my bestfriend!? I want to punch something, punch him, but I'd never hurt her. I think she deserves to be hurt but I won't do it. As I'm walking home in thee rain today, I think about how happy he makes her and how happy she makes him. Am I wrong not to be happy for them? No matter what, she's still in love with him and he's still bad for her. The sad facts but I guess I couldn't be any better.
November 27th, 2012
A list of my favorite things
-Watching the wind move the leaves and watching birds fly
-Flirting
-Partying
-Writing
-Dancing
-Music
-Performing
-Risky text messages
-Making memories
-Milk hershey's chocolate and cherry coke.
December 5th, 2012
Write about a favorite activity in your childhood.
I liked to play with my brat dolls and go outside a lot. I guess until earlier in the year I had a treehouse that my dad built. Everyone was so proud of that treehouse that the other kids on the street claimed that their dad's helped make it. I used to love to play in the mud and "make food" out of plants and water and things like that. I loved playing house with my sister and just you know, what every little six year old girl loves to do. I had a pretty damn good childhood and I'm ptoud of that.
January 23rd, 2013
Braindrain
I can't fathom the thought... he gave her confirmation. I don't know? That could be mainly yes and a little no... But now that I'm thinking about it, that could be the same 'I don't know' from August. And if it were, than I'd know it's worthless. But if it's a DIFFERENT 'I don't know,' then I'll spend all summer thinking "Damn, I should have told him... but now it's too late... he's noved on." This is my last chance to save those feelings. I don't kow it I can do it, though. I've already began to push him further away because I thought it'd be better for him. Better if he didn't know, didn't get so close as to fall again. ****** is just such a confusing person that it makes my heart sink. Never thought it would have ended like this.
January 31st, 2013
Braindrain
Sigh, he puts me to bed. Well he has for the last few nights and I've been awake, alert, and rested for the past few days. <3 He gets brownie points. I think *****'s talking to me now. That's not even fair! Not even my fault! It was his and hers. Oh well, who cares. We are definitely on the same page, I think. It's like a game we play. As far as he wants to go, I do, too. Since I didn't say gooodmorning this morning and acted like I didn't see him, he did the same. It kills me to know that he's in science right now with that lady. He's mine. Keep your hands off. And that's one of the secret reasons I don't like her.
February 1rst, 2013
Braindrain
We're on the right track.... Lalala, happiness! And this month has a lot to offer, a handful of opportunities. If I play my cards right, I may be in luck. But everything is going just hout I want it. I'm so joyful, I just want to scream it to the world. And with my choice-reduction, everything has become a bit easier. So yeah. Happy Friday, Peace&Love, And stay forever cool kids.
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